Food? How ridiculous..


I went to my now husband’s father’s house for dinner shortly before our wedding. After dinner, dessert was served. My husband had a piece of pie sitting in front of him that I was picking at. Suddenly his dad yells at me, “Hey! You shouldn’t eat so much! You’re getting married!” What. The. Hell. Engaged women don’t get to eat? I should be on a diet so I can lose weight and not look like myself all for the sake of one single day? Besides the fact that it was my husband’s pie, but no one thought to chide him for eating. I mentioned it to my husband later, who told me to relax, it was just a joke. But you know us gals, we love to overreact!

Guess it’s MFIF.

Philadelphia, USA


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4 Responses to “Food? How ridiculous..”

  1. jesurgislac Says:

    No, it wasn’t a joke: and yeah, I’d be pissed too.

    Your dad-in-law was being an ugly bully: your husband is evidently so used to his “sense of humour” that he doesn’t notice it.

    Hope you can avoid your in-laws.

  2. atozinco Says:

    I hate ‘fat-shaming/fearing’ comments about what women should eat. I think women of all shapes get these comments, at least occasionally (I’m fairly slim, and I eat healthily, but my mother & family will sometimes express surprise over what I’m eating or how much I am eating – or make jokes about it).

    • atozinco Says:

      (I’m replying to myself because I can’t edit my previous comment): Women get told in so many ways to lose weight and monitor what they eat, it is particularly frustrating to then have your own FAMILY push these expectations onto you.

      My family doesn’t know, but I DO monitor what I eat quite a bit. Because I am a girl, and I have pressure all around me to be slim, I don’t eat junk food all the time like my brothers do (but I do eat it sometimes). My family don’t know that the main reason I eat “healthily” is to avoid putting on weight. I think the way I eat is healthy and good (I don’t starve myself and I still enjoy my junk food), but the reason why I eat “healthily” is not good.

      It feels like salt is being rubbed in the wound when my family then make comments (or jokes) to me about what I am eating.

      My father made a sexist joke to a couple he’d just met the other day. They were newly married, and the man mentioned how his wife doesn’t like cooking as much as he’d expected her to (because she’s a woman), so they share the cooking in their home. My father saw this as the perfect opportunity to throw in a “Why do bride’s wear white? So that they can match the kitchen appliances” joke to suggest that the woman was under an obligation to do the cooking because she had worn a white wedding dress. Unsurprisingly the joke fell quite flat. My father has very egalitarian views on gender roles, but for some reason he does love his sexist jokes (“it’s just a joke!”)

  3. user123123 Says:

    Well, hate me if you will, but it sounds like a joke to me. It sounds like it’s not an appropriate joke to make with you since you don’t have the type of relationship for that (yet), though. Or either talk to him or have your husband talk to him about never joking with you like that again.

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