Sick to the stomach

by

I was coming back to work after a two month sick leave due to gastroenterological problems that made me lose a lot of weight. Even though I have always maintained a healthy weight during the 9 years I worked in that office, many people noticed my weight loss and commented: Wow, you look gorgeous! If you were taller, you could be a model! What gym did you go to? and so on… at some point, I lost patience and I politely told off a co-worker, saying that this weight loss was due to illness.

But it was a guy with whom I had a brief affair many years ago, when I was young and single. His answer: “You’re the first woman I see who gets angry when told that she lost weight. If I hadn’t seen you naked, I’d swear there is a penis under that skirt!” So because I am displeased when people mistake a serious disease that makes ingesting food a torture, for a desire to look like one of those anorexic models, I must be a dude. #MFIF

Juliet

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8 Responses to “Sick to the stomach”

  1. scrivener212 Says:

    I don’t know what to say this. People are just insane. I’m sorry you had to put up with it, and I hope your health continues to improve.

  2. mcsqueeky Says:

    That’s awful. I guess a woman has to be skin and bones to be considered attractive.

  3. sitakali Says:

    This is why we need to get rid of “Fat Talk.” I’d add that “Skinny Talk” is the same thing. “Wow, you look great! Good for you for getting sick!”

    I honestly know women who have tried to get food poisoning to lose weight. We need to destroy this disgusting obsession with weight.

  4. jesurgislac Says:

    I met a woman who’d just spent months on chemo and had surgery for a benign lung tumour. She told me that she’d lost about twenty or thirty pounds in the space of about three months completely off work for cancer – and everyone at work had known she was on long-term sick leave for cancer. Yet they’d greeted her on her return with compliments on her lost weight.

  5. junebug1986 Says:

    I can identify with your situation to a degree.

    A few years ago I was about 30-40 lbs overweight and I finally decided to get in shape because I wanted to feel better and get in shape for skiing.

    When I went to family get-togethers or parties everyone kept praising me for my new figure, how much more beautiful I looked, how I must love wearing bikinis now, etc, etc.

    Instead of being flattered by the compliments, they made me feel worse. I mean, it seems like they were all affirmations of how BAD they think I looked before I lost the weight. All of the compliments were vanity-based. Not one person said anything about how I must physically feel better and healthier.

    That’s how it is for women with weight loss. It’s all about vanity: impressing men, looking good in a bikini or a mini dress, etc.

  6. Branch Monster Says:

    My BFF and I decided that it is never a good idea to compliment someone on sudden weight loss for exactly those reasons.

  7. jaylancaster Says:

    Happened to me. Crohn’s disease made me drop from a healthy 9 stone to an unhealthy 6 1/2 and all I got were compliments on “managing” to lose weight. In no sane mind should I have looked healthy. But brainwashing means skinny=attractive.

    If I eat too much fat now, I get seriously unpleasant side effects. Still, people tell me that I’m “lucky” this disease means I don’t put weight on and I should be grateful that bits of my bowels have been hacked about. RIghtio then.

  8. corridor7f Says:

    I’m glad you’re feeling better and hope things stay that way.

    I had a similar experince where my appetite plummetted due to a severe wisdom tooth infection. Got all the positive comments and questions about what diet I was on.. meanwhile, the unholy pain I experienced was glossed over because I lost weight!

    So insulting. I love food and have always been open about it, both before and after the infection.

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