MBA by (female) assocation


I attended a top-ten business school in the US and graduated within the last ten years. As a believer in higher education, I made a point to save enough money to donate enough to be considered a top-tier alumni donor my first year out of school. This was a big deal for me, as business school was expensive. I wrote the check — which lists my name first and then my husband’s name (who has a different last name than mine) — signed it, and sent it off.

A few weeks later, a glossy packet came in the mail with a thank you letter for joining this top-tier alumni donor group. It was all very nice, except the packet and the letter were addressed to my husband.

I guess my husband received his MBA by simply being married to me. I imagine that the reverse would not have been true. #MFIF


12 Responses to “MBA by (female) assocation”

  1. jenniferengland Says:

    Did you say anything about it?

  2. H Says:

    Same question as jenniferengland. I would have been tempted to threaten to not donate anymore if they sent me something so offensive – probably wouldn’t have actually stopped, but they need correcting and to give an apology.

  3. Axiomatic Says:

    Why wouldn’t you have stopped?

    • H Says:

      Because it sounds like the OP has a very strong belief in helping less advantaged kids to get into higher education, and perhaps that conviction would override the need to give the sexists ‘what they deserve’. Still, perhaps she could find a way to redirect the money to students without going through this awful bunch of people.

      • Trix Says:

        Seconded. I would have sent a letter explaining why they were not going to receive another cent from me, then found some suitable kind of scholarship to contribute to instead.

  4. MissPrism Says:

    Another one asking – was there any follow-up? I’m hoping you got a grovelling, personal apology from whoever sent this letter, their boss, and their boss.

  5. MissPrism Says:

    …because, if I heard that my alma mater had failed to apologise sufficiently profusely for a sexist fuck-up like this, their chances of ever getting a donation out of me would fall from “rather low” to “slug in a salt mine”. I suspect there are a lot of alumni who feel the same, so the school concerned should be dealing with this very carefully.

    • Lbutlr Says:

      Yep, have to agree. Of course, I would have reacted rather strongly. When my wife and I bought our first house we were very careful to put everything in her name as it was mostly her money we were using. We had to have the FEMALE mortgage agent redo several forms, some of them more than once, to list her name first. In at least one case, her name wasn’t on the forms at all.

      We still get property related junk mail addressed to my name though, but this has its advantages: anything relating to the house addressed to me gets tossed in the rubbish, unopened. (well, shredded first)

  6. Enoon Says:

    Wow, you can tell they really appreciate their donors.

  7. Fluglehorn Says:

    And that’s when you add strings to your donation–perhaps your donations should only be used to create fellowship funds for female MBA students?

  8. jesurgislac Says:

    I really hope the OP will get back and let us know what she told the MBA about their disgustingly sexist mistake.

    Insulting a wealthy donor is generally not considered a good plan…

  9. Holly Says:

    It’s at times like this I really wish we named names on this blog. I of course understand the reasons for not doing that, but…I’d just really love to know which school it was and see if being called-out on this blog would lead to any sort of apology, à la Kwik-Fit.

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