When no means keep asking

by

Conversation (very abridged) with a male coworker today:

Him: So when am I coming to your place?
Me: You’re not.
Him: But you invited me to your place for dinner.
Me: No, you invited yourself.
Him: So when am I coming? Are you free on Saturday night?
Me: No, why would I be? (today being Thursday already)
Him: Are you free on Friday night?
Me: No.
Him: So can I call you on Saturday?
Me: No.
Him: So when are you free?
Me: I’m always busy. I have a very busy life.
Him: So you’re always busy for me, is that it?
Me: Yes, that’s right.

10 minutes later:

Him: So when are you going to make time for me?
Me: You know, it’s really rude to keep pushing when a woman has already said no.
Him: But you didn’t say no. Ok ok, I won’t say anything more.

Later:

Him: So, will you give me a hug after work today?
Me: No.
Him: That’s ok, you can give me one tomorrow.
Me: No, I won’t. It is not going to happen.

Repeat ad nauseum.

Finally:

Me: You know, this could really be construed as sexual harassment.
Him: Whoa whoa, I’m just joking.
Me: No, to be a joke it actually has to be funny to someone other than yourself.
Him: Calm down, I say it to all the girls.

#MFIF.

Sarah, London

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12 Responses to “When no means keep asking”

  1. jesurgislac Says:

    You know, you can report him to HR for sexual harassment (if you have Human Resources and if he’s not management) or to your union (if he IS management).

    Because that’s serious scary sexual harassment.

  2. Matt G. Says:

    To say it “could be construed” as sexual harassment is too generous. I don’t see how it could possibly be construed as anything else.

  3. yolanda Says:

    classic, very. I used to shave my head into a mohawk just to keep these creeps at bay. I mean, sure, persistence can be attractive, but this is just him being selfish and ornery. When it’s a coworker, though, it definitely counts as harassment and if possible, he should be reported. If impossible, verbally emasculate him a few times till he learns not to poke the porcupine.

  4. Katy Says:

    That kind of behavior is downright scary and insulting.

  5. JB Says:

    I had a stalker who thought that because I said hi to him, I was giving my consent to be the mother of his children someday. I finally confronted him; I made him cry. God, that felt good. Guess you didn’t make this one cry; then he’d probably leave you alone. Unless he likes punishment. There are some freaks out there…

  6. Dude Says:

    Oh, he says it to all the girls. Then it’s clearly not sexual harassment.

  7. Werewolf Within Says:

    So all his female coworkers are preteen? Or is my definition of ‘girl’ completely skewed?

  8. Dude Says:

    Did you report him?

  9. Brian Vonder Says:

    Is it additionally appalling that he expected to come over to your house and would make him dinner?

  10. Vee Says:

    “Him: Calm down, I say it to all the girls.” Oh great! So you sexually harass all women? That REALLY calms me down!!!

  11. Allie Says:

    God, you’re way calmer than I am. My conversation would have gone like this:

    Him: So when am I coming to your place?
    Me: Never.
    Him: But you invited me to your place for dinner.
    Me: No, I didn’t. Fuck off.
    Him: So when am I coming? Are you free on Saturday night?
    Me: Seriously, WILL YOU JUST FUCKING FUCK OFF.
    Him: Are you free on Friday night?
    Me: I am going to knee you in the groin.
    Him: So can I call you on Saturday?
    Me: *knee in the groin*

  12. celia56 Says:

    Him: Calm down, I say it to all the girls.

    My reply: So you won’t be surprised when I knee you in the groin then…

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